Stress Management Archives - Snowrose blossom

Accidents, Illnesses, and catching up; Oh my!

Posted on January 17, 2026January 17, 2026 by Snowrose

This fall has been a dumpster fire of accidents, illnesses, and catching up on life! I have not been ill so many times since my son was in JK years ago. A flu, a cold, a stomach flu, and a cold that turned into a lung infection over the Christmas holidays! Thankfully, my son was barely sick when each ravaged through the house, and my husband only caught a few. That being said, my poor husband has torn the rotator cuffs in his shoulders at work and has been slowly healing with lots of physio! So many illnesses and accidents! I hope that this winter will be less overwhelming than the fall. My husband’s shoulders are slowly healing, though his left shoulder may need surgery (we will know after he gets an MRI). It has been quite a juggling act.

Hard seasons like accidents and illness

I think it is fair to say that this was a particularly hard fall/start of winter for many! One of my best friends had her mother-in-law in the hospital with pneumonia, and most of the people I knew got very sick multiple times. Seasons like these stretch us to our limits, but thankfully do not last forever. I am hopeful to be able to get back into a rhythm as January continues.

Catching up

It seems as though I have been spending this January simply catching up on life. For anyone following my blog, you can see I’ve not been able to write in quite some time. Thankfully, I think I am finally getting a better rhythm again, as I have needed to prioritize housekeeping and homeschooling over writing until now. At this point, I will be re-adjusting my schedule to better accommodate the changes in my family’s needs with the limits my husband’s injuries place on what he can and can’t do when he is home from work.

ADHD, Coaching, Mental Health, Sam's adventures, Stress Management

Transitions are hard!

Posted on September 4, 2025September 4, 2025 by Snowrose

Transitions have never been fun for me. September is, for most of Canadian society, a month of many transitions. It is the start of the school year for students and parents. It is the start of activities, sports, and groups in the fall. It is when Parish life picks up after the summer break. There are so many transitions within this month!

What makes transitions harder for some than others? To an extent, we can rightly say that everyone is different! For those neurospicy individuals like me, though, transitions are distressing. I have an overlapping symptom set with Autism, and I find immediate transitions and longer-term changes to be very difficult.

What can help in tough transitions?

For me personally? I have found certain strategies work better than others to support me during times of transition. Being able to visualize the expectations inherent in each change has been the most effective tool to keep nervous systems regulated.

While some thrive with bullet journal set-ups, I find making them much more enjoyable than actually using them. I used to use handwritten agendas to mark my calendar and visualize my time and commitments. In the digital age, though, as a mom (who doesn’t really like carrying more than I have to after the years of diaper bags), I find phone calendar apps to be just as effective as a written agenda.

At home, I also use a whiteboard to indicate which days I have chosen for what household task. With homeschool, we have a dedicated bookshelf space with each day’s topic set aside. We use a master list with clear expectations of which day has which topic.

What have you found helps most during transitions?

Coaching, Goal Setting, Health, Mental Health, Sam's adventures, Stress Management

Exciting update: Grow Your Happiness

Posted on August 14, 2025August 14, 2025 by Snowrose

Publishing soon!

Over the past two years, I have been steadily working on a book titled “Grow Your Happiness.” In this book, I offer a method of increasing your baseline happiness through intentional gratitude. The front matter explores the scientific literature on dispositional happiness (the day-to-day baseline happy feeling you return to after ups and downs) and how gratitude can increase that.

The book is almost ready for publication and will be published in September!

In “Grow Your Happiness”, I have made the scientific information accessible and easy to read, despite citing over 20 studies and primary sources. You will learn the real impacts of this virtue on the happiness you experience. Next, after exploring how gratitude can make you a happier person, you will find 365 prompts. These prompts were intentionally chosen to increase the breadth and depth of this important virtue steadily over time.

A sneak peek inside:

I’ve given the book a sunflower theme, with earth tone colours. There will be a Kindle edition in plain text for anyone who wants to use their preferred journal. I chose the sunflower theme to symbolize the journey of growing happiness. Sunflowers are beautiful plants whose blossoms always look towards the sun. After all, they need direct sunlight and grow into huge flowers that brighten up any space they are planted in. Accordingly, I hope that everyone who uses this journal can also look at the proverbial sun of gratitude and blossom into happier people!

Here is an example of the journal theme:

I hope that this book will reach many people. I believe it will make a dramatic impact if used intentionally. Gratitude is such an important virtue! Although this book focuses on increasing dispositional happiness, the research shows much more. There is research coming out showing that gratitude can positively impact your relationships, health, and more!

IFS, Mental Health, Reflections, Sam's adventures, Stress Management

Building Community

Posted on July 31, 2025July 31, 2025 by Snowrose

I have often wondered what it would be like to live somewhere where building community is part of the culture. Over the last five years, I have been trying to build community intentionally, and I have found it to be needlessly hard. Canadian culture, especially in the big cities, is not anything like the international community imagines. We have an overdeveloped sense of autonomy and an individualistic mindset. From the conversations I have had with those who immigrate to Canada, the culture shock is isolating. As someone born and raised here, I love my country, but I hate the autonomy of our culture.

My experience has been common: building community is hard. It is easier to live interdependently in rural areas, but in the city? Oh boy, individualism is the ideal. This has been detrimental to our population for so many reasons. While everyone has a fundamental integrity need for agency, individualism takes this principle too far. People wonder why rates of mental illness are continuously on the rise in Canada. The simplest answer? Broken homes and no community. I realize those topics are heavy and loaded, but as an adult child of divorce, I can attest to the impact of both. Canada is a land with so much potential, despite its cosmopolitan history. It’s not too late to turn things around for the next generations.

The solution? Intentional Community Building.

If we want to turn the tide on mental illness and suicide, we need to work intentionally to make and foster a culture of community. To be honest, we need to embrace the Canadian stereotype and welcome the level of hospitality and kindness that the international stage believes we have. To be honest, I don’t know the steps needed to make that change, but I know it is the direction that we need to go.

It has taken me 5 years to start seeing the fruit of building up a community at my local parish, with consistent support from my friends who live in other parts of the city. It took even longer to overcome the internalized autonomy. I believe every effort is worth it. As I have learned more about psychology, I’ve come to understand the importance of community. We are a species that thrives on healthy interdependence. Isolation kills, community gives life. Let’s work together on building a community.

Coaching, Mental Health, Reflections, Stress Management, Trauma

Forgiveness vs. Reconciliation

Posted on July 3, 2025July 3, 2025 by Snowrose

As an adult child of divorce, there have been many lessons I missed receiving due to the nature of my family situation. One of these was the idea of forgiveness. This is especially true when looking at forgiveness and reconciliation. I’ve come to learn in my adult life that these are two very different but interwoven concepts. Like many others in broken families, I have worked to learn about what I didn’t get. In this way, I hope to break the cycle and live out a resilient family life with my husband and son.

Forgiveness is for me

To begin, I think a fundamental realisation is that forgiveness is not actually for the other person. Forgiveness is for me. If I have been injured in some way, forgiveness is not pretending it was ok, sweeping it under the rug, or becoming a doormat. Unlike these examples, forgiveness means recognizing I am rightfully owed a debt of injustice, whatever that injustice may be. You can only truly forgive by acknowledging what happened. Forgiveness says, “I recognize you cannot pay for this injustice, and I forgive you the debt”. Forgiveness means I allow myself to process and release the emotions of hurt and pain. This means I recognize the broken humanity in us both and choose not to harbor it against you.

Reconciliation is for you

This is where the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation comes in. In choosing to forgive, I choose not to hold onto it, but that does not mean that the injury to the relationship is ignored. Whether I re-establish the relationship and how, now that is reconciliation, not forgiveness. I have forgiven the debt owed, and from there, have to establish boundaries and see whether the transgression is reconcilable. To rebuild a relationship after injury to trust, both parties must show accountability. If one or the other cannot acknowledge their behaviors healthily, it is not possible to reconcile. Next, the injured party chooses forgiveness, and the injuring party exemplifies a genuine desire to change. If the one who has caused harm refuses to change, then boundaries need to be set to protect yourself. There is no one-size-fits-all how-to-reconcile, but those are the fundamentals to see if it is possible!

How to model these as a parent

In my youth, I was not modelled either forgiveness or reconciliation. I am a firm believer that modelling is the most effective parenting strategy, and the science is there to back me up. “Do as I say, not as I do” just doesn’t promote sound psychology or human formation. Teaching your child to apologize helps them learn accountability. Saying you forgive them is only a small part of modeling forgiveness and reconciliation. To truly model it, you need to allow them the opportunity to forgive as well. This means apologizing when you misbehave as a parent, and let’s be real- we all do. Allowing your child to practice forgiveness can prevent the common childhood wounds of shame, support emotional regulation, and encourage resilient self-confidence. By teaching your child both how to be accountable and to forgive, you uphold their dignity and show them a better way to relate and live.

Catholic, Coaching, Health, Mental Health, Prayer, Reflections, Sam's adventures, Stress Management, Trauma

Why Everything at Once?

Posted on May 29, 2025September 11, 2025 by Snowrose

I was having a conversation with a friend recently, who has been going through many many trials, all converging at once. She was feeling distressed, with good reason, but also found deep confusion over why God was allowing this timing.

In these circumstances it may seem like God is leaving you standing with no direction, or that you are being left to solve everything on your own. In my experience, counterintuitively, these circumstances are actually always an invitation.

An invitation? To chaos and pain? Well, no, an invitation to go deeper. Deeper into your relationship with Him, your relationship with yourself, and your relationship with others.

Diving Deep

Going through life, there are always situations that are difficult and distressing, but they don’t necessarily mean you will experience an overwhelming level of emotions. When life events stir up a huge cascade of emotions inside, there are generally 2 main causes.

You do not have a FELT sense of having enough support from your internal resources or social support network.
The big emotions were already there inside, and you are in a situation that is poking at the places you did not receive love, support, and safety throughout your life.

An invitation

This is where the invitation comes in. In the first example, if you are in a difficult situation without feeling supported- it’s time to reach out and get help. That is no easy task, because it may not feel safe to do so, but you would be surprised how many people have lived through similar situations and who may have an attentive ear. You are not alone in the journey, others are traveling through the storms like you.

If your heart is being flooded by the intensity of your past experiences, that’s where you are being invited deeper into a relationship with God and yourself. Those places that you have lived through hardships that were held onto are usually there because the original experience was like scenario 1. You didn’t have the external connections necessary for post-traumatic growth. These are the places that we protect ourselves from the most inside, the places of trauma–big “T” and little “t” alike. Truly, these are the places that God wants to come into for healing and communion. These are the places we shut everyone out from, ourselves, others, and God alike.

But why?

Can’t he just take it all away? Make it better? Of course, but only with an invitation in, entering into the worst of it freely. God allows the circumstances of our lives to be invitations to self-reflection and awareness of the pains that we hold inside our hearts so that we can invite Him in on our own time to finally meet those unmet needs. We are made with such dignity that God will not tread freely through our hearts but will wait patiently until we are ready to say yes.

If life is getting too much, will you open the door?